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Last night I had another near-break-down. The kind where I say, “what am I doing with my life??” and “I can’t do this anymore.” and “I’m going to quit. and I’m serious this time.” Friends, I’m not good at setting healthy boundaries for myself— not good at self-discipline, and not good at saying “work is over for the day, it’s time to stop,” and not good at just relaxing and being, either by myself or with friends. The pressure has been building for awhile, but it got to the point where I was ready to just… yeah. Quit.
Can I just say, right here and now, how grateful I am that God places people in our lives with the ability to look through our drama and speak truth? And I’m beyond words grateful that one of those people happens to be my roommate. She listened to me nearly lose it, quietly spoke truth to me, and reminded me not to make any rash decisions, that I really do love photography, love shooting weddings, and love love.
Fact: rash decisions are rarely wise decisions. Sure, this has been a challenging week. Nothing seems to go as planned, I’ve felt tired, sick, and achy, friends have been particularly needy, my mind has been particularly distracted, and my work days have been unusually stressful and unproductive. But the thing God keeps bringing to mind (and some of what Lindsey said last night) is that He is sovereign, even over frustrations and apparent roadblocks. And frankly, I have no business fighting Him for what I think is best when He is obviously working out best for me. Time to rest, then. Not time to cease working (there is still work to be done), but to work humbly and work well. And I think it’s time to outsource more.
. . .
And just to give you a glimpse of my life… here’s a bit of the past couple of months. Via Instagram.
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favorite Starbucks | favorite burger joint | clouds | brothers | marshmallow roasting in the city
current favorite book | dinner spot w/ roommie & her sis | tourist | cutting it close on gas | favorite boots
broiled grapefruit | tax season | breakfast | dumb parking ticket | sweet potato fries = heaven
real estate photography | metro symmetry | Chinatown | engagement shoot | I love my bed
apples & bacon | sister day | soy chai | finally bought new Tevas | discovered the Library of Congress
Easter tulips | Louisville | day-off reading | work from coffee shop | quasi-studio shoot
Ebenezers | to-do lists | morning mist | new return address stamp | Sweet Lobby goodness
gummies | late birthday gift | new nail color | new ampersand | orange smile
progressive dinner | sister’s braided hair | strawberries & coconut milk | Capitol Hill flower boxes | me
PS— my instagram name is “scdanaher”… if you feel like following.
Sarah I’m so sorry to hear you’ve been so stressed, but I’m really glad you talked it through with your roommate. Please DON’T quit- you’d be leaving a gaping hole on the DC photog scene, and to be honest? It needs you. It needs your spirit, your wisdom, your cheerful heart, and your gorgeous imagery.
Sarah, I’m very sorry to hear about all of your struggles lately. That sounds so hard, and it’s understandable to be frustrated when things get unbearably overwhelming. You have such a gift, and so much to offer to the world around you. I think maybe you need a nice vacation where you can get back to the roots of why you like photography while distanced from the stressful work side… whatever you choose to do, I hope that it’s renewing and that the road ahead starts clearing up. xo
Oh Sarah. I understand. It’s hard when everything begins to get overwhelming. When it just all seems to come at you at once. I hear you. God is good, though, bringing us back to him. Reminding us of the truth–showing us what is true. You are truly talented at what you do. Believe that. God will take care of you, through all of this. I’ll be praying for you, Sarah.
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